The Scanner: Teen Wolf, Punky Brewster and Deep Fried Butter

Did you fear the Scanner disappeared forever? Silly reader. The Scanner can never die. It will outlive us all as long as the Internet has hilarious, obscure or otherwise awesome tidbits to offer. Although sometimes The Scanner does need to go into the shop for service. Man that's expensive.

Eagle-eyed NXT reader ac found this on CraigsList Maine: "Millionaire Matchmaker Reality Show Casting Call." Plan accordingly ladies.

Signs of what is wrong in the world? MTV is remaking "Teen Wolf" as a TV drama. From the network of music television and "16 and Pregnant," now comes this punch in the Boof. Thanks MTV. [Hollywood Reporter]

Behold! The 5 pound Gummi Bear. And they said it wasn't possible!

It had to be done: "GI Joe" and "Team America: World Police." Are they one in the same? [Future of Classic]

Ice T does not care for the Genius Bar. He prefers to deal with his Mac the old fashion way. [Cult of Mac]

The Apple Job: 23 MacBook Pros, 14 iPhones and 9 iPod Touches stolen in 31 seconds. [Laughing Squid]

The US Department of Health and Human Services issues joint statement with Department of the Obvious: "College Students Get More Drunk When Drinks Are Cheap"

Oh, but wait, according to this story old folks have also been known to knock back up to five drinks at a time. So, there is that.

I've been submitted to a lot of things at the Minnesota State Fair, a lot of food on sticks. But The Texas State Fair wins with Deep Fried Butter.

HR Got it Right: A woman was apparently fired for using ALL CAPS in an e-mail. [Geekologie]

Want something with the potential to get YOU fired? Try ShhhTwitter, which sends your angry, spiteful Tweets to the boss anonymously! Good luck with that.

Proof once again that Michael McDonald makes everything better: The white-bearded wizard of smooth music has lent his talents to Grizzly Bear. (Ironic?) [Stereogum]

Gamers take notice! Now you can script the dialogue for the classic "Super Mario Bros." "Thank You Mario" stage ending scene.

My fellow pop culture geeks, have fun with this gallery of "32 Heroes Who Must Play a Deadly Game - Or DIE!" [io9]

It is entirely possible I would eat more Asian food if I had Chop Sabers. You hear that Portland's multiple Thai restaurants?

For a child of the 80s you would think the idea of Soleil Moon Fry throwing on the Punky Brewster costume again and shouting "Punky Power" would be uh...let's say nostalgic. No. Instead it's a little terrifying. [Best Week Ever]

If it works at DePaul University, remind me to pitch at "Twitter Journalism" class to USM for next semester. [Valleywag]